Can Separation Save A Marriage

Sometimes, married life may become extremely stressful and the couple may find it miserable to live together. When this happens, some couples wish to have a trial separation which may help to work through the difference between both the partners. In some cases, separation is prohibited by cultural or religious rules and they prefer to live apart though legally remaining married. The question is that can separation save a marriage and does it really work?

There two ways of marriage separation, either informal separation or legal separation. Generally, informal separation is what you both agree by a mutual understanding. There is a formal division of the property, arrangements about possession of cars, credit cards and bank accounts. A legal, formal separation is more complicated, permanent and expensive. People undergoing the process of legal separation go through time, pain and expense.

Generally, separation is not the first step to save a marriage. Many couples first try to participate in marital counseling which may help to work through the differences. Some couples seek out an advice from the friends, family or religious leaders. Many people are successful in resolving their marital problems after participating in couple retreats or marriage seminars.

Along with these options or after trying these options, the couples choose a trial separation. Now, you will wonder can separation save a marriage; is it an appropriate way to save a marriage? Yes, it may be helpful as it gives an opportunity to both the partners to experience the feelings of being separated before taking any final decision. The major advantage of trial separation is that it is reversible.

During the period of trial separation, you may go through marital counseling, think over it and then take the final decision. This separation period gives you ample time to think about your differences, your mistakes, problems in your married life and ways to resolve them.

An absence of daily bickering and conflicts may be an effective answer to the question can separation save a marriage. Due to a lack of proximity, there is absolutely no chance for conflicts. Both the partners get enough time to think over their marital problems. Most of the marital problems originate from fear, ego or stubbornness. Resolution is possible as long as one partner wishes to keep trying.

The main purpose of trial separation is to develop the skills of resolving the problems before moving back together and working on improving the relationships. For a couple, a planned separation can be a good time to think, to analyze, to reflect, to calm down and cool off. It helps to make thoughtful decisions and thus work to save a marriage.

In some cases, separation may be unplanned and there may be no plans for marriage counseling, no tentative time-line for separation and no guidelines agreed about seeing others. Hence, before you think about separation, talk with each other about the individual goals of separation. Both should be ready for seeking individual and …

Separation in Relationship

Today’s ‘modernistic’ societies have opened the doors to a totally different perception about relationships, particularly the marital relationships. New standards of “living together”, divorce, and remarriages have created an appealing option for people who no longer want to take the ‘extra mile’ of saving their relationships, thus the uncontrolled separation in relationships.

At this very moment, there are a lot of couples taking the transition between marriage and separation, which can come in different forms and motives. For some people, separation in relationship is a preparation stage for the divorce process. On the other hand, there are those couples who view separation in relationship as a means of making space and reducing the tension of the commitment so they can make up their mind on whether the marriage can be salvaged.

When a marital relationship looks as if it’s falling apart, separation in relationship can be a method for couples to dig up a more objective analysis of themselves and the advantage and disadvantages of the relationship, thereby giving each other the chance for understanding.

Here are some guidelines to put in mind when choosing separation in relationship as a change period that will show the way to either compromise or divorce:

Make a tangible plan. There is more to separation than merely being away from each other and disconnecting. Besides the emotional factors of separation, there the matter on financial, children, and household responsibilities, and couples need to talk about them and think them over.

Focus on balance. Separation in relationship is a period when couples can go into their own different places and think their over their relationship crisis, and honestly look into resolution or divorce.

Be honest. After one is able to rethink and balance the relationship, and still feels that absolute separation is needed on his or her part, being honest about it and communicating it is very important. Holding back these feelings is unfair to the other just because one fears the reaction of the other or the guilt.

A new start. Contrary to some couples ending in divorce of the separation stage, some couples realize how much they need and value the relationship, resulting to new desires that would make the relationship much stronger and healthier.

A respectful ending. If for whatever reason, the separation stage does not help reconciliation and results to divorce, then the best way is to accept the other’s decision and begin the necessary legal steps. Anger although a natural reaction, should not be allowed to hinder the process as this would further add pain and frustration.

Separation in relationship should not always be taken the negative way, more often than not, they become ways of re-energized, stronger, and more valued relationships.

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